This news flash from Long Island, New York.
The Brilliant Jewish Guys' Network has finally solved an ancient and thorny issue. The network's public relations officer, Bernie Swelling, has announced a startling new treaty between the BJGN, The Gorgeous Shicksa Collective and the Union for Funky Old Broads. This development has arisen out of notorious psycho-sexual dynamics that have long been simmering between these three organizations. While the Brilliant Jewish Guys have long confessed their weakness for Gorgeous Shicksas, a complaint has also surfaced that the aforesaid Schicksas lack skill and imagination. On the other hand, the Funky Old Broads seem to possess these qualities in abundance. An arrangement has been reached whereby the Jewish Guys can look at naked Gorgeous Shicksas while actually making love to Funky Old Broads. This historic agreement, says Bernie Swelling, will change the world as we know it. "It's a win-win-win situation" comments the celebrated flack "or at least a win-maybe-win-maybe situation. Or something like that."